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Not Actually Accredited by any
Reputable College Commission
The University of Psychogenic Fugue
is a certified "place of learning," currently in good
standing with at least three loan sharks who all have ties to
the mob. Although not technically a member of the Conferences
and Committees of Colleges and Universities, quite a few of our
current faculty have had a lover with a spouse who is a member
in good standing with that organization. Additionally, until the
University apologizes for what it said, the U.S. Office of Education
denies even speaking with us on the phone. Students who question
our reputation are encouraged to review a particularly pretty
file folder in Le Bibliothèque.
There, students will find a variety of semi-satisfied former student
evaluations.
The University of Psychogenic Fugue has
a designated CCCU Answer Girl who can address all your boring
legal questions, but she's usually out to lunch.
The University of Psychogenic Fugue will no longer provide each
new student with a free pencil. However, there is a slim chance
you will receive a piece of coal.
The University of Psychogenic Fugue is open to everyone - even the wickedly ugly and dumb. In laymen's terms - this means you. Although it's convenient to say we're a four-year college, students are never pressured to quickly finish their degree. In fact, we encourage students to take as much time as they deem fit to fulfill their educational objectives while cleverly delaying the inevitable debt pay-back period. Some students elect to stay for almost ten years, while most graduate in around five.
This catalog supercedes all previously published versions and automatically beats out any other attempts to parody a college course catalog. All the complicated rules, regulations, and procedures contained within are real and really must be followed exactly like it says.
Though it's theoretically possible, this catalog is not designed or intended to be read from cover to cover. Rather, it is the perfect coffeetable book, bathroom reader, or traveling companion. It's the ideal book for a fast-paced world where no one has time to read anymore. Consequently, there is no right way to read this catalog.
As always, the University reserves all rights regarding policy-making and in certain cases may be forced to alter your major course of study without your consent or notification. Furthermore, the University is under no legal obligation to listen to you whine about it if or when it should happen. Additional information about how this could directly impact your entire future is currently not available for student review.
Note: The University of Psychogenic Fugue is a complete mythology. Any resemblance to actual people, places, or things is purely coincidental.