
[+]DDivision
of Arts
Degree: Associate of Cuisine (AC)
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You don't have to know a bunch of recipes
or keep track of all those crazy food groups to be a great chef.
All you need is a can opener and an open mind. The Department
of Culinary Arts has a psychogenic kitchen fully stocked with
state-of-the-art culinary appliances, such as an almost new microwave
with digital timer and rotating tray. So put on your puffy white
hat and join us for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and a snack. Just
follow the mingling aromas of catfish and chocolate. And don't
forget to wash your hands.
CAR101RSnack Food
CAR102RFast Food
CAR103RInstant Food
CAR104RLiquid Food
CAR105RLiving Without Food
CAR201R20th Century Popcorn
CAR211RWaitrons
CAR222RFine Dining
CAR266RSpeedy Thanksgiving
CAR311RDay-Old Food
CAR401RFood of Science
CAR456RCulinary Arts PracticumT[Prac. defined]
CAR464RPot Luck Experience
CAR470RSissy Drinks
CAR498RDorm Cooking
CAR499RGreat Chocolate Drought
CAR501RDiet Viagra Soda
CAR522RArt of Making Ice
CAR599RRestaurants III
CAR699RRestaurants IV
CAR700RHomemade Bread in the 21st Century
CAR707RBreakfast for Dinner
CA 104 LIQUID FOOD
Learn how to outwit thousands of years of evolution by turning
to the latest trend: liquid food. Delicious petroleum-based drinks,
taken in lieu of breakfast, lunch, and dinner, offer many advantages
over typical and outdated solid food. An obvious advantage comes
with time. Before liquid food, families were literally chained
to the dinner table for hours on end being forced to communicate
with one another. Thanks to strawberry, chocolate, and soylent
green flavored liquid food, dinner will only take a fraction of
the time! You'll never go back to traditional food again.
CA 105 LIVING WITHOUT FOOD
Due to tremendous social pressure to look good, food just isn't
an option for many people today. This state-approved course will
teach you how to live without food. Instructor/model will cover
a broad spectrum of topics including: body fat and organ failure,
don't thin yourself to death. Learn how to order a home intravenous
machine direct from the manufacturer. A must for models, actors,
cheerleaders, and their agents.
CA 456
CULINARY ARTS PRACTICUM
Every student who takes the Culinary Arts Practicum will be assigned
a randomly selected faculty supervisor. The student will then
become said supervisor's personal chef for an entire semester.
The student will be required to prepare and serve a four-course
dinner for five in the comfort of the supervisor's home once each
week. Students are solely responsible for discovering the culinary
likes and dislikes of their faculty supervisor. Students will
be graded on taste, presentation, and service. Any student who
accidentally poisons their faculty supervisor is required to repeat
this course until they achieve a passing grade.